Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Bring Us Your Cycling Latvian Hindus

I think I've said before, that as far as kids go, you two are a little young for my taste. I'd love to skip everything from diapers through driver's ed and get started right around freshman year of college. Ideally, we'd pick up on your first semester break when you come home for Christmas to inform me that our consumer culture is a form of mind control and you're only eating ham if it's made of organic tofu. That's what I remember learning anyway. Your results may vary. As we've discussed, I didn't buy the books.

Anyway, countless ultrasounds continue to confirm that neither of you are going to be ready for college in the next couple months (even though it would be WAY CHEAPER if you just got it out of the way now). Even if you were accepted you probably wouldn't make it through a single lecture without defecating in your seats, something that's still frowned upon everywhere outside of Berkley.

But it turns out that my dream of college age adoption lives on. It's called picking an au pair. We've done our interview, written our essay, and been forced to wrestle with some unexpectedly difficult questions. Is it more important that our au pair like swimming or cycling? Do you have a higher opinion of Latvia or Hungary? How much would you say you know about Hinduism? It's like computer dating, only instead of being for single people who like going out it's for married people who are about to stay home for the next five years memorizing Pixar movies. We answered cycling, Latvia, and lots and crossed our fingers.

And somehow we started getting matches. The bad news is, French speaking au pairs are apparently hard to come by. Everywhere I turn someone wants to remind me what a waste of six semesters that language was. So far our favorites are from Brazil and South Africa. That pretty much means Portuguese or an incredibly cool accent.

It's humbling to talk to people who are so interested in seeing America they're willing to leave their own families for a year to be part of ours. On the other hand, it's kinda terrifying to think that six months from now this house will have gained two infants and a teenager (a cycling Latvian Hindu teenager). Right now your mom (and you two by extension) is at work. There's one cat asleep on a chair to my left, another on the table by my feet. It's so quiet I can hear the fluorescent bulbs in the kitchen.

I should probably go enjoy that while I can.

Novel - pg17
Dunking - wk5
French - looks like we're back to me, I mean moi.

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